Your Needs Matter
I know how it feels to believe that your needs don't matter. It can lead to feeling unsupported, resentful, and completely burned out. I've been there myself, where for so many years, I held the belief that it was a good thing to be highly independent.
I didn’t connect that belief with the isolation, the frustration at not 'magically' receiving the help I needed, the putting everyone else first (because I was 'strong') and the endless resentment. It's an exhausting and toxic cycle.
Why do we get stuck in this cycle?
Our childhood is often the key to this belief system. We generally don’t remember whether our parents or caregivers were emotionally unavailable, dismissive, or indifferent to our needs and feelings. We also don’t realise the impact of constant criticism or excessively high expectations from our parents, or even the impact if one or both parents were absent due to work, divorce, death, or abandonment.
What I’ve finally learned over the last few years, is that your needs absolutely do matter as do mine. In fact, honoring and nurturing yourself is the key to showing up as your best, most vibrant self for the people and causes you care about.
Is this me?
Not sure if this is you?
If you struggle with any of these, there's a chance you hold this belief deep in your subconscious.
- Withdrawal (feeling isolated and that nobody cares)
- Don't ask for help or don't know how to
- Overcompensating by putting everyone else first
- Passive aggressive (frustration and resentment from not getting own needs met)
- Self neglect (downplaying your own need for rest and relaxation)
The hardest part of all of this is, we have no idea how to identify or articulate what’s missing from our lives and what changes we’d like. And so we continue with the pattern feeling more and more miserable.
Where to begin?
My next few blogs will delve into how BodyTalk can shift the old reality and make space for new as well as share some techniques that can help you:
- Feel deeply supported and cared for, even if your outer circumstances haven't changed,
- Overcome the fear of asking for help and receive the support you deserve,
- Find a balanced, sustainable way of living that prevents burnout,
- Release the resentment and passive aggression that can build up when your needs are ignored.
Your light and gifts are needed in this world - but you can't pour from an empty cup. Finding balance between giving and receiving is hard but you deserve it.
If you are ready to prioritise your own healing and restoration, I'm here to walk alongside you every step of the way.
Sending you so much love and encouragement,

There's never been a better time for a Mind & Body Reboot
Get a helping hand in releasing toxicity from your body and mind - book a BodyTalk Session (in-person or online). I'm in Somerset West, Western Cape.
Curious about the state of your wellness? Sign up for this FREE workbook – “My Holistic Health Check-In”.
The new, lighter you, will thank you.

